Cherishing Traditions: American Thanksgiving in Germany

Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday.

Unlike Christmas, which is mired in commercialism and bears the "burden" of thoughtful gift giving, lavish decorating, and endless obligatory festivities (kids' school parties, your office party, your spouse's office party, the neighborhood cookie exchange, plus the parties with friends that you actually want to attend...), Thanksgiving is so SIMPLE.
Yet so special.

Thanksgiving is our closest loved ones gathering around a delicious meal to give thanks for abundant blessings. It is a time when we relish good food and celebrate life, family, and friendship.  That's it.  No gifts.  Not too much decorating. Not much to stress over. Just a time to reflect and be thankful.

There are many who criticize Thanksgiving. Some say the whole "Thanksgiving story" of a feast celebrated by European settlers together with the Native Americans they nearly obliterated is a myth; a fantasy to appease our guilty WASP conscience. The nay-sayers dismiss it as an outdated custom from a time that should not be celebrated for the brutality that came with colonization. Others bemoan the gluttony; too much food prepared and served to an overweight society. There are those who fret over the hormone-injected, caged turkeys raised on industrial farms and cruelly slaughtered. OK, I get it, there is always something to find fault with. To each his own.

For me, Thanksgiving is a beloved tradition of humble gratitude and grateful celebration. It's heartfelt and more true than anything else I celebrate all year long.  It's a time to say "thank you" even when life sucks; a time to put my pain and struggle in perspective, and acknowledge that whatever else we may suffer, my family is not hungry or homeless (anymore). We are are not living in a war zone. No matter how much we may have sacrificed since moving abroad, we are not impoverished or even terribly deprived. We have a beautiful home, have made wonderful friends, and we have our health and each other. That's quite a bit to be thankful for!

So once again this year, I made every effort to recreate the family traditions that have marked all the Thanksgivings of my life. The actual Thursday holiday was a normal school/work day here in Germany, so we postponed the feast until the following Saturday. But at the beginning of the week I set the dining table with my antique Gurley candle figures of Pilgrims and Native Americans that were part of a tradition passed on from my Mom who also had a collection of these candles for her holiday table. And I began to test out recipes and plan the menu for the celebration we would share with some of our exchange daughters and close friends.

It was our second holiday in Germany, and I'd learned a few lessons since hosting the feast last year. So this year's "adventures of American cooking in Germany" went off much easier and more relaxed. I knew what ingredients I could easily find, which ones I would need to hunt for, and which I would have to simply do without and substitute. I was able to order a fresh turkey from a wonderful local farm - thank you Buchholz!

I found fresh cranberries in a couple local markets, as well as sweet potatoes and sugar pumpkins. I discovered that the ground pork known locally as "Mett nach Thüringer art" made a fantastic substitute for the spicy sausage I used in my grandmother's stuffing recipe.

To my delight, I even found an adequate replacement for Pillsbury Ready-made pie crusts (Süßer Mürbteig)! Typically I bake at least 4-5 pies with fillings made from scratch, but I despise the tedious process of homemade pastry that never tastes as good as I'd like. So I was very happy to find that the Süßer Mürbteig worked well for the apple pies.

For the pumpkin pies, I got creative and made the "crust" from toasted walnuts, Leibniz cracker crumbs, butter, and brown sugar. The nutty crust, quickly concocted in my food processor and baked for about 15 minutes prior to filling, was a beautiful complement to the earthy flavors of a spiced pumpkin pie!

The food all came together very nicely, with much of it prepared ahead of time, so that on Saturday I had time to relax before our friends arrived for dinner. In my quiet time, I reflected, again, on how far we've come in the last year and how blessed we are.

This is the spirit of Thanksgiving, so unique from other holidays, which I dearly cherish.

                                                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Spiced Cranberry Sauce


The homemade cranberry sauce was a first for me and I was very pleased with the flavors and textures. The recipe was simple and I'll share it here for you (measures are estimates)....

500g. fresh cranberries (about 3 cups?)

1 cup of light brown/raw sugar 

1/2 cup white sugar

1/4 cup gelatin sugar (optional)

1 cup fresh squeezed orange juice

1 cup water

fresh orange zest

a cinnamon stick

2 anise stars

about 6 cloves

1/2 tsp vanilla or a package of vanilla sugar

Put all ingredients in a pot and cook over medium-low heat for about an hour. Berries will soften and "pop." Stir regularly. Strain the mixture through a sieve to remove the whole spices and berry skins. Store the sauce in the fridge until ready to serve. The anise adds a mysterious and exotic hint to the flavor! If you want a whole berry sauce with more fruit pulp, you just need to be able to fish out the cloves, anise and cinnamon before chilling it, or spoon some of the fresh pulp back in after straining and ensuring that there are no spices.

Growing an International Family Through Exchange

At a reunion with my host family October 2012

Sometimes I'm not sure how to answer simple questions like "How many children do you have?" or "How many brothers and sisters do you have?"

Because in addition to my four biological children, and my two biological brothers and four step siblings, I have this large, extended, but closely-knit international family that won't fit on your average family tree and that many people have a hard time comprehending. This is my YFU family: Youth For Understanding.

With YFU, I have two exchange brothers in different countries (one where I lived as an exchange student in Germany, and one from Sweden who lived with my family in New York when I was a teen.) And then there are all my "daughters."  These are the girls we hosted while we lived in Maryland. There are six whom we remain very close to, and a couple others we loved for a time, but for various reasons have not stayed in touch with.

Seeds
Twenty-five years ago I won a scholarship to spend a year going to high school and living with a host family in Germany. I could not, at that time, begin to comprehend how it would impact everything about the rest of my life. This is when the seeds were planted and my international family began to take root; where the rest of my life and family sprouted.

During my exchange year I lived on a small farm, in a very small village on the Baltic Sea in Schleswig-Holstein. When I arrived, I did not speak a single word of German. The language wasn't offered at my high school; I had only learned French. (I had wanted to go to France, but there were no scholarships there and my parents could not afford to send me on an exchange year. Desperate to travel, see the world, and meet new people, I grabbed the only chance I could get and applied for the Congress-Bundestag scholarship to Germany; close enough, right?).

My host brother spoke a fair bit of English, but honestly, we didn't get along too well at first. I was not what he had in mind when he asked his parents to host (the exchange organization didn't have any boys needing placement; so they got a girl - to my host mother's delight and my brother's chagrin). My host father spoke a bit of English, but worked 15 hour days on the farm. I spent most of my time outside of school helping my host mom in the house or garden. She did not speak a word of English. We both got very good at charades!

I am very grateful to my wonderful volunteer host family for taking me in. Despite not having much to spare economically, they were generous with everything they had, especially their patience and love. They taught me so much about their culture and language and helped me learn a lot about myself. We remain close today, and my host brother and I have built a strong bond.

Tree Branches
The amazing experience I had with Youth For Understanding inspired me to stay involved with the organization and share the love and learning with other young people. Initially, upon my return to the States, I got involved as an area representative. I worked to find host families for international students coming to the US, then mentored the students and families through their year together, lead cultural orientation sessions, and organized various outings and events in the community. I've now mentored about 50 students, some of whom I grew very close to and continue to stay in touch and visit with.

Daughter Stefanie (Denmark 2001-02)

After I was married, had a house and children of my own, we started hosting. This is when our family really began to bloom. My children grew up with older exchange siblings from around the world.

One great benefit of always having an exchange student in the house is that we placed a high value on doing things together as a family - going on day trips and establishing traditions to share with all of our children. When faced with the choice between doing yard work on a beautiful Saturday or taking the exchange student and our kids river rafting and for ice cream in historic Harper's Ferry, WV - well, maybe our garden was in bad shape, but our kids had amazing memories and learned a lot about the history of the area where we lived near Washington DC and Baltimore.

Every holiday was celebrated with enthusiasm as a chance to show off American customs to each new exchange student. Each year, we'd drag our students off to a tree farm to cut down the Christmas tree. We would take haunted hay rides at Halloween and carve pumpkins, color and hide Easter eggs in the Spring. The list goes on. Our exchange students brought endless adventures to our lives and helped us live fully and learn about ourselves, as well as about their cultures. Christmas cookie baking marathons included new recipes each year, brought to us by our exchange daughters from around the world. And my kids learned to say "please" and "thank you" in the languages of the kids we hosted each year.

Flowers 
As my children reached their teens, it's no surprise they wanted to have their own exchange experiences. My oldest daughter won a summer exchange scholarship to Finland when she was only 14. (One year after she spent the summer in Sweden with my host brother's family!). Marissa had a fantastic host family as well, and we were very glad that her host sister could then visit us the following June. And last summer my son was invited to visit them (they also had a boy his age). We hope we will get the entire family here to visit us in Germany soon!

Butterfly Garden

Daughter Katja (Switzerland 2002-03)

There's been a bit of cross-pollination from all these exchange experiences, in vastly different ways. I could tell a million stories. Several of our exchange daughters have met each other (during visits after their initial year) and become "international sisters." We've developed close ties with some of the natural families of the girls we've hosted. One year, on a trip to my husband's family in Hamburg, Alice (arrival student in 2000 from Munich) came up to visit us and brought her sisters. Another year, our Italian daughter (Tamara, 2005-06) also met us in Hamburg, with her parents and brother. And we've become so close with the family of our daughter, Janna (Germany 2004-05) that they took us all in when we first moved to Germany over a year ago. For two months they helped us find a place to live, look for schools for our kids, get the new house painted, buy appliances, figure out insurance, etc. There are no words for the generosity they bestowed on us - they were a life line!

My Global Family
So how many children do I have? ....
I guess I have a heart full :)

Here are a few pics of my global family.... I love them all!!!!

With daughter Janna (Germany 2004-05) in Canada in 2006

With daughter Tamara (Italy 2005-06) during a visit in 2008

With daughter Viki before Prom (Germany 2006-07)

With daughter Inessa (Germany 2007-08)

With daughter Grethe-Marie (Norway 2008-09)

Tamara and her boyfriend visit while we hosted daughter Edith (Finland 2009)

Janna and her boyfriend visiting in Summer 2010

International Sisters with Tamara and Alice (Germany 2000) in Munich 2012

Pizza Culture: An International Culinary Adventure

The other morning I sat down to breakfast with the morning newspaper and a flier for a local pizza delivery company fell in front of me. One glance at the pictured specialties and I lost my appetite for the eggs on my plate.

A large photo featured a pizza with hard boiled eggs, broccoli, corn, and curry sauce! Seriously? Does anyone eat that? With a little imagination I can believe people might like curry sauce with chicken and pineapple on their pizza - but eggs and broccoli?! No. Thank. You.

Glancing through the Joey's Pizza ads, I found several combinations that challenged culinary couth. How would you like steak, asparagus, and Hollandaise sauce on thin crust? Feeling a little dull? Try the sharp edge of a "Pizza Hot Conchita" with spicy BBQ sauce, hamburger, bacon, red onions, Mozzarella, and chili peppers. And call the fire department.

Flipping through more pizza menus, I had a flashback to the first meal I shared with my host family in Germany as a 16-year old Congress-Bundestag Exchange Student. The day I arrived, they took me to a festival along the beach near our home on the Baltic Sea, then out for dinner at a local Italian place. Since I didn't speak any German, I opted for the first thing I was certain I understood on the menu: Peperoni Pizza. I really couldn't understand why my host brother seemed so surprised and asked me if I was sure that was what I wanted. Until it sat before me. I quickly discovered to my horror that "peperoni" in German is not at all the same as "pepperoni" in English. Rather, in Germany, this is a hot green chili pepper. If you want the traditional American pizza topping, then you need to order "Salami." I've tried to warn unsuspecting tourists about this, but it never fails that visiting friends forget, and order a pie full of hot peppers.

After seeing the flier with hard boiled eggs on pizza, I jumped online and surveyed my Twitter friends for the strangest pizza toppings they've found outside the US.  I got some interesting feedback! Here are a few of the oddities people have encountered around the world:

• Dönerfleisch (shaved seasoned lamb similar to that used for Greek Gyros) with onions, peppers, and tzatziki (a cucumber and garlic-based yogurt sauce).
  
• Tuna fish, shrimp, salami, spinach, and garlic.
  
• Mixed seafood (including octopus, mussels, shrimp, and clams) with garlic.
  
• Pineapple, ham, and onions (although I've often seen this "Hawaiian" combination in the US, too).
  
• Turkey, artichokes, and onions.
  
• Olives, sardines, capers, Feta cheese, spinach, and garlic.
  
• Smoked salmon, spinach, peppers, and garlic.
  
• Eggplant, spinach, broccoli, onions, peppers, mushrooms, and artichokes.

I can be adventurous with food. So I'd be willing to try a few of these, but some topping combinations are just too much of a challenge to my open-mindedness.

What are your preferences for pizza? Anything you've seen that made your stomach turn over? I'd love for you to share your thoughts and experiences!


Photo Credits & Disclaimer: all photos are from advertisements for Joey's Pizza in Muelheim an der Ruhr, Germany. Joey's has not sponsored or endorsed this blog in any way. I have not actually tried any of the mentioned pizzas.

My Life from My Brother's Perspective?

In less than 24 hours, my "kid" brother, his significant other, and their combined five children arrive in Germany for a 2-week visit. I'm very excited to see them all and to welcome them to my new home and my new country.

But as I've been cleaning the house, shopping, planning day trips in the region, and otherwise preparing for their stay, I find myself wondering what my brother will think of my life here. What differences will he notice; what rituals will he find odd? How will he judge me and my life compared to what he used to know?

Will my brother be surprised that our one fridge is half the size of either of the two we had in Maryland? What will he think when he sees that we now buy milk and juice in little 1-liter paper boxes, rather than mega 1-gallon plastic jugs?

I suspect he'll find the scale of many things here - including our house and yard, to be much smaller than he expects.

Will he notice that none of the windows or doors have insect screens?

I expect my brother might be startled when we're sitting around the living room in the evening and electric shutters over all the windows roll down automatically and entomb us in secure darkness :)


Will he wonder why there are two buttons above the toilet for flushing (will he ask what's the difference between them)?

Will he be surprised that the towels, which we hang dry after washing, instead of using an electric dryer, are a bit stiff and scratchy - as opposed to the super soft-fluffy towels we always had in the States?

Will my brother miss breakfasts of pancakes and waffles and bacon, as we gather around a table of bread rolls and jams, cheeses, honey, and Nutella?

He already knows we now have only one car, rather than two, having ditched the mini-van before we moved, but will he be surprised when he realizes how much and how far we walk everyday? Or ride our bikes? What will he think that the kids ride trams and trains to meet their friends in neighboring cities?

When we head out, will be be surprised that we pay for use of public toilets? That we need to put a coin in the grocery cart? Or bring our own bags to the stores?


I look around at the life I have here, which is starting to feel normal and familiar, and wonder what will be strange about it to my brother?

But no matter how odd and out of place things may seem, one thing will be very much the same: I'm still the big sister and he's my grown up baby-brother :) And I can't wait to see him!

Summer Travel - First up: Munich

Summer is here! Well, sort of. The calendar says it's summer. And finally the schools have capitulated and released our kids for six weeks. The weather...well that's still holding on fiercely to a cool rainy spring program. Nonetheless, with the young ones out of classes, it's time for our travel season to begin! First up: Munich.

My oldest two children are getting a bit cheated this summer. They have to spend the first three weeks of break in a different kind of school: intensive language camp. They moved to Germany as high-school aged teens and were dumped into a traditional Germany college-preparatory in the manner of "sink or swim." Although they were made to repeat a year of school in the name of "catching up" with the language, it was evident at the end of the academic year that they still needed a lot more help improving their vocabulary and strengthening grammar. Understand: they did amazingly well under the circumstances, passing all of their classes and maintaining in some cases better grade averages than their German peers. But they want to and can do better. So we enrolled them in a program through the Humboldt-Institut that offers 30 hours per week of intensive German language training to kids aged 15-18 years old. The camp operates out of a Youth Hostel in Munich, so we drove them there this weekend to drop them off.


It was a great chance to tour the beautiful city, spend quality time with my girls before their camp started, and visit with two of our former YFU exchange daughters. Despite grim forecasts, the weather in Munich cooperated beautifully for our visit and both Saturday and Sunday we were graced with a fair amount of sun and moderately warm temperatures (low to mid 70'sF or 22-25C).

Since Saturday was the first day of Summer Break for North-Rhine Westphalia, we set out by 3:30 am to beat the anticipated heavy traffic. It was well worth it, as we made the drive straight through in about six hours, arriving in time to meet our Italian daughter, Tamara, for breakfast (she had taken a bus up from South Tirol, also getting in about 9:30am). We indulged in scrumptious Nutella-filled French toast at the lovely Richart Cafe in Marienplatz - I highly recommend it! - with perfect views over the square to the Town Hall with its famous musical clock tower (Rathaus-Glockenspiel). After breakfast, we got out in time to watch and listen to the Glockenspiel which plays for about 15 minutes every day at 11am (and a few other times each day during the summer). 

We then spent the next 4-5 hours walking off the gluttonous meal while devouring the magnificent architecture of the city. We visited the Asamkirche, the Frauenkirche, the Residenztheater, and the Stadtsoper, among many other places. The pictures here don't do these incredible structures any justice - you must see them yourself!

By mid-afternoon, we needed to rest and were prepared to take in more delicious tastes and sights, so we returned to the city center and snagged awesome seats on the terrace of another Richart establishment: the Cafe on Markt in the Viktualienmarkt. Here we sampled traditional Kaiserschmarrn (cut-up sugared pancakes with raisins and apple sauce). Yummy! Must. Do. More. Walking.

Next we headed to our hotels to check in and clean up (we'd now been up since 2am and were starting to turn a bit Zombie-like). We walked out to the Best Western near the main train station (Bahnhof), where our Italian daughter had a room, and then trekked clear to the other side of town where my family was staying at the Marriott Residence Inn closer to Ostbahnhof (east side of town).  Both hotels were very nice and I can recommend both, although I was a little more comfortable on our side or town. The area around the main train station is diverse and lively :) 

After showers and fresh clothes, and band-aids on our blisters, we decided to drive to the Englischer Garten and substitute Beer and Pretzels at the Chinese Tower for dinner. I'm afraid the pictures from that evening escapade are not suitable for publication ;) Needless to say, we all had a great time!


Sunday we were up and at 'em early again, as we had breakfast reservations at another amazing Marienplatz restaurant: The Glockenspiel Cafe. Ok, after this trip, I need to join a gym, because I'm not sure the intense kilometers of walking are enough to cover the calories we consumed! At least my half avocado filled with shrimp salad and accompanied by massive amounts of fresh fruit was a healthier option than the French toast with bacon :) 

Again, this place should not be missed on a visit to Munich - but do make reservations; they serve the breakfast menu until 4pm, but also have lunch and dinner menus. We chose to sit outside, since we'd already witnessed the Glockenspiel - but if you want a view of the Town Hall (Rathaus) then ask for a table inside.

Right after breakfast, we went over to St. Peter's Church (Peterskirche) and spent the best Euro and a half per person you can possibly invest in Munich! After a vigorous workout climbing more than 300 narrow wooden steps to the steeple pinnacle, we were rewarded with the one of the most beautiful panorama views in Bavaria. On a clear day, you can see from St. Peter's beyond the other church spires to the majestic Alps.

It was incredibly windy at the top, and we were rather winded from the climb, but after catching our breath, we snapped some breath-taking photos! (How many cliches can I use in one sentence?)

Reluctantly we eventually made our way down from the tower and headed back to the Englischer Garten. On such a beautiful day, we knew we'd find surfers at the Eisbachwelle. I'd never seen river surfing before and thought this was pretty cool. On our way there, we gawked at the naked sunbathers and stopped to take free lessons in  slacklining from a few kids who were practicing in the park. All new and fun experiences!

Detouring through Hofgarten on our way back, we were serenaded with a fantastic solo Cello performance.  That was easily worth another Euro investment :) We also visited the Ludwigskirche, where our German exchange daughter from summer 2000 was recently married to her Swiss love.

Finally, we met up with a group of friends at Munich's oldest continually-operating cafe: Luigi Tambosi near Odeonsplatz. Here we lingered for a few hours over Aperol Spritzes and other cocktails, just enjoying the balmy weather and the company of good friends before delivering the girls to language camp and driving back to Mülheim.

The entire stay in Munich was less than 34 hours, but we managed an impressive array of sights, sounds, tastes, and experiences. Still, there is much more to be discovered and I'm looking forward to returning in a few weeks when camp is over and my brother is visiting with his family, as well!

Anyone have suggestions for my next Munich adventure?

Happy Birthday America, With Love from Germany!

Often it's the holidays that are the hardest for an Expat. We miss celebrating traditions with our family and friends from "back home." But these can also be a wonderful opportunity to connect with new friends in an adopted country. So while today is a huge national holiday back in the United States, while merely an ordinary school and work day here in Germany (we're not even out on summer break yet!) I'm making the most of it all week and enjoying sharing a little American history and culture.

With summer holidays starting next weekend, we chose to ignore German taboo and celebrate early. So last Sunday, July 1st, we decked the house out in full patriotic flair with red, white, and blue streamers and flags hanging from all the windows and eaves and lining the drive to clearly announce that Americans live here.

We put up a tent, strung bright balloons everywhere, with lots more flags in the backyard, set out decorated tables and chairs, and invited over 50 friends from our German neighborhood and the local Expat community - meaning Brits and Singaporeans and Scots, as well as other Americans.

I had spent weeks hunting down patriotic paper ware and decorations from Internet stores. I scrounged up classic recipes and calculated metric conversions and figured out ways to improvise on missing ingredients. (They don't sell blue Jello in Germany!).

I also spent way too many hours compiling a "patriotic play list" of music for the party. Of course it included classics like Springsteen's Born in the USA, Mellencamp's ROCK in the USA, and Greenwood's God Bless the USA. But my kids also contributed modern hits like Redneck Woman from Gretchen Wilson, Party in the USA from Miley Cyrus and a Beyonce version of God Bless the USA. 

While grilling cheese burgers and hot dogs, served with BBQ baked beans, various salads, chocolate chip cookies, fudge brownies, and Jello shots, we clarified that this was a celebration of our country's independence from Great Britain and not the end of the American Civil War (some Germans had a heated debate about that!)

We were thrilled that nearly all of our guests, without prompting, dressed in red white and blue - one enthusiastic guest even had the US Flag painted across her face! It was brilliant (despite the Union Jack flag on her shirt)!


We were very lucky the typically miserable weather played nice and we enjoyed a beautiful sunny day. Lots of kids came, and it was fun to listen to their exchanges in "Denglish" (or "Germish") as they played - since all of the kids present were fully bilingual in English and German.

Two of the American women who joined us have lived in Germany for at least 10 years, married to German men with kids born here. I had met each of them incidentally through businesses they own locally. While I didn't know either very well, I thought they might enjoy a taste of home and invited them to celebrate with us. I was very excited that they came and had a great time. Both have written this week to tell me how great it was to connect after so many years with other Americans and to eat foods from home (like Rice Krispie treats!). It made me feel good to offer them a bridge to their native culture.

Today it was a bit sad to pack the kids off to school (like it was on Thanksgiving Thursday, as well). But they each wore their patriotic colors and took some American treats to share with school friends. One son prepared all the ingredients for homemade buttermilk pancakes with maple syrup and cooked breakfast for his class!

And tonight we have our monthly Native English Speaker Quiz Night, where the Quiz-master has promised an appropriately-themed array of questions. He's sent us some warm-up items and I'm afraid my chances of winning at this one are rather slim, but I know it will still be fun!

Can you answer these?!

• Which president's pet parrot had to be ejected from his funeral for screaming obscenities at mourners?
• Which president, when short of funds, offered White House china as the ante in poker games?
• Eleanor Roosevelt made news in 1939 when she served what dish to visiting King George VI and Queen Elizabeth?
  

Anyway, lesson of the week has nothing to do with American history, but everything to do with attitude. As long as it is a holiday in our heart, then it can be a happy occasion!

Happy Birthday, USA, with lots of love from Germany!!

Photo credits for most shots: Viki Behm, our German exchange daughter (06-07) who drove up from Passau to spend the weekend celebrating with us! Oh the joy of throwing a party and being surrounded with the laughter and love of family & friends!